Match Report

The week leading up to the Inter-Straggler game was dominated by player drop-outs, as team sheets (23 signed up in mid-June) shrank to a modest 19.  Replacements were hard to find (the best excuses from those in Dubai and Kyrgyzstan), the players turned up at Torry Hill on yet another hot day, including the President and Nige, both of whom were encouraged out of retirement.  The only positive feature was that almost everyone was involved all day as umpire, scorer or reserve fielder as well as actually taking part in the game.

As the game was something of a ‘Snape fest’, with Hugo and Toby captains and Nige ambling between mid-wicket and fine leg while in the field, the match report will also include excerpts from the Snape family WhatsApp group report.  Post-Stokes, McCullum and the first women’s Test at Lords, the cricket world needed a new story.  The Shepway Stragglers delivered.

Toby won the toss (of a mobile phone) and elected to field. The game was played on what can only be describes as a ‘treacherous deck’.  The opening bowlers had a couple of overs ‘hitting Jack Wood’ a Straggler tradition established on tour in Amsterdam, when Hugo was ferocious and Jack had made the mistake of offering to play for our opponents, ACC. With the ball leaping off a length, jagging sideways and shooting along the ground batting was far from straightforward, and the opening bowlers were quickly forced to turn to spin.  Felix Elliott, hat-trick hero of Sissinghurst in May, removed two in two balls to have another opportunity, but he was kept out. His second wicket was a Straggler slip catch, comparatively straight forward, looping to Charlie.  With pace off, Jasper and Patch M milked the bowling for a while, avoiding the horrors in the pitch, while despatching anything over-pitched to the boundary.  Just as they looked set, Stabber persuaded Jasper (33) to feather one down the leg side, gratefully received by Al – 80 for 3.  However, this only brought Harry P to the crease to hurry things along for a partnership, with Patch, of 93, finally brought to an end by George bowling Harry (44).  Mitch (65) then fell to a full toss (can’t blame the track) from Al, who had swapped out from behind the stumps, the miscue gently lobbing to Felix at point – 188 for 5 in the 31^st over, but with time and batting to spare.  However, the tail wilted in the heat; Felix returned for another couple (4 for 33) and Al (3 for 13), dropping it on a sixpence, brought matters to an abrupt conclusion, with the President caught behind by George.  There can’t be many games in which a keeper (having taken a catch behind) has gone on to take an outfield catch and three wickets. On a challenging pitch, a total of 212 was probably par for the course.  Patch, Jasper and Harry had dealt pretty well with the demons, but the demons now lay in wait for the Stragglers.

Angus Hay, opening for the Stragglers, was still in ‘see ball, hit ball’ mode, which may not have suited the conditions and was gone in the first over, caught in the covers by Hugo off Henry (2 for 33).  Archie Brealy followed shortly thereafter, the ball barely getting above ankle height. Charlie (18) had looked to have mastered the conditions, when another shooter, this time from Jasper, knocked into the stumps – 27 for 3 and looking ominous.  George had arrived at the fall of the second wicket and was now joined by Stabber. Both dealt with the vagaries of the bounce with careful consideration, with the occasional boundary out of nowhere, with Bruno Wainman keeping it particularly tight.  Putting on 76 for the fourth wicket, it came to an end, when Aska Kanai Smith (2 for 25), who had been keeping for the first part of the innings, persuaded George (49) into offering the gentlest of return catches. I (Toby) batted at six and Hugo, rather rudely, brought himself on to bowl (after a run of singles). He snicked me off with his second ball. I don’t want to talk about it. I’m still livid. It’s right up there with things I’m not ready to discuss, No. 1 still being the stag I missed last year, which genuinely had the thinnest neck in the world. I still maintain it may actually have been an ostrich.

In the interim, Stabber had also fallen for 41 to a ball, which did not bounce at all, hugging the ground.  There was debate about the legality of the delivery, but this brought Felix and Al together at 155 for 6 in the 29^th over of a possible 37.  All to play for as they kept up with the rate and did their best to avoid offering chances.  The most obvious chance came from a wonderfully struck switch hit by Al, which very nearly went straight to Jasper, prowling at deep cover.  Al (26) fell in the 35^th, having put on 55 with Felix.  What followed now was a gripping contest. With three runs still required, Nige strode to the crease. The second-highest run scorer in Straggler history, having held the all-time record for well over a decade, he looked every inch the professional. Preparation had clearly been meticulous, including naps at 11am and 4.30pm, the latter on a boundary bench.  Under apparent instruction, Felix (30*) blocked out the penultimate over to give Jack a maiden.  The final over arrived with three still required. Three consecutive dot balls followed; then Hugo donated a no-ball. Tension was palpable.  The penultimate ball. Nige clipped it through the leg side. It never quite reached the boundary, but that didn’t matter. He charged back for two like a gazelle (there is some editorial doubt about this analogy). The young pretender had thrown everything at him, but the old order held firm.  With one ball remaining, Nige had brought the Stragglers home again, victory by 2 wickets.